[Video]

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

[Kit looks tired and pale. She's been working on recovering from her pounding at the hands of the local thugs, but she still has a ways to go. And she has a problem.]

Okay, cards on the table. I give up on my secret identity. Can't do it.

[Oh, for a city of a million people and a hypnotist for a partner. We never know what we've got until it's gone.]

Anyway. I understand there are some decent scientists around. I got caught in a nasty ambush and my suit took a real beating. My gliding membranes are torn, I blew something in one of my static shoes... Heck, there are just some bullet holes that need dealing with. I also could use help getting my grapple gun back into usable condition, though I might be able to figure that one out on my own. And I have one knockout gas grenade left, so if anyone could work backwards from there...

Right. Fact is, I'm the danger and daring-do half of the equation. Left my mad professor back home, y'see. Can anybody lend a hand?

Comments

[bruiserprincess]

A secret identity's an awfully important thing to just give up.

[Not that she ever had a chance at one. BUt they had a whole war about that.]

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

Tell yah what, kiddo, if I get home and run into anybody from here for some godforsaken reason, I'll have the boss hypnotize you so hard you won't remember your own shoe size. But I can't fix my own gear, and I doubt anybody's gonna want to help if I try and wear my cowl the whole time.

[bruiserprincess]

I guess that makes sense... the grownups were fighting an awful lot about secret identities at home though.

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

Our identities got rumbled once. Well, a couple times, but seriously once. What we did was go round to every government office and plant a phony story about us in each one until nobody had any idea. Got so we could track any leaks by what crazy ideas the bad guys had about us.

[bruiserprincess]

The government was the whole problem.

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

Yeah, I've never liked those guys either. Lucky for me, back when they rolled that plan out they didn't take lady heroes, so I had free reign to mess with all of them.

[bruiserprincess]

They've been after mutants for ages even though we were just born like this. Then they went after everyone.

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

Yeah, I don't envy you your universe, peaches. Does sound like the government I know, though. Give 'em an inch, and they start secret rogue units and perform weird experiments on volunteers that you hafta run out and reverse before they blow up the monsters they made to save face.

[What an oddly specific example.]

[bruiserprincess]

Why do they always do stuff like that?

[Oddly specific and yet sorta familiar]

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

Heck if I know, puddin'. The things we've dug up... And there has to be a lot we don't find out, master detectives or no master detectives.

[bruiserprincess]

At least with the bad guys you know where you stand.

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

You'd think that. We have an ongoing debate in my household over whether knowing why the goofballs do what they do is helpful. And there've been a few recruitments and even the odd team-up with the supervillains in my time.

[bruiserprincess]

No one's ever really sure what's going on with some of them. But the C-listers trying to set up in LA are always straightforward.

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

It's true. The low tiers of supervillainy are pretty straightforward. It's when they get weird vendettas going and lose interest in profit that they get real funny.

[bruiserprincess]

That's usually when the whole nemesis thing gets started. The ones we fight are up against us because someone has to fight them off.

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

Oh, don't even talk to me about the nemesis thing. The Mad Monkey has gotten so darn weird about the boss I sometimes want to lock them in a closet and let them work it out.

[bruiserprincess]

Think that would work? Or would there just be an exploded closet?

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

I wouldn't worry about them too much in hand-to-hand combat. The Red Panda's a lot tougher. The Problem with the Monkey is when he has time to get his baboons in on things, or brings a bunch of those stupid coconut bombs.

[bruiserprincess]

Baboons.

You have an A-lister who uses baboons?

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

I wouldn't let the kook hear me call him an A-lister, an' he's never done much outside Toronto. Just decided to be my husband's arch nemesis, an' we never figured out how to get rid of him or his smelly pets all the way. His powers are actually pretty scary when he's not being crazy, so I kinda appreciate the baboons, tell yah the truth.

[bruiserprincess]

I wonder if Alpha Flight ever deals with anything like that. We don't hear much about their villains.

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

Now that's a snazzy name. I'll keep that one in mind.

[bruiserprincess]

They're the big Canadian team. Wolverine was with them at the start.

[Well, actually...]

Wolverine's been on a lot of teams.

[girlinasquirrelsuit]

Hmm, I like it. The biggest org we have right now is the Danger Federation. Not as snappy a name.