Angry Pilot Rant #1 | Video

[whoneedslegstofly]

Right so. The first time this happened? It sucked but, you know, there was a reason. But I also didn't wake up in a stasis pod; just ended up on an unfamiliar planet.

So whoever thought this was a fun joke? It's not.

[Someone doesn't sound thrilled. At all. In fact, he sounds a cross between tired and pissed off and looks it too.

He's leaning up against something, his legs not really wanting to work for him at the moment as he tries to get his bearings.]

Someone send Cortez down here to get me. Now.

Comments

[Video]

[standsentinel]

Ah... no.

[Which is not to say that Kaidan, Vancouver-raised as he is, is unaware of what being high is like.]

If memory serves me right, I'd probably be giggling at random intervals and I'm pretty sure nobody wants to see that. But seriously, it's dinosaurs that are a sticking point, when we've just hammered out that there are different copies of Shepard scattered across realities?

[Video]

[whoneedslegstofly]

[Oh ho~ So someone does know how to loosen up and have some fun!]

Hey, I've already talked to both Shepards. I'm kind of over the shock of that. Dinosaurs though? I mean, sure we all joked about turians looking like dinosaurs but I'm assuming you're not talking about turians running around in the wild.

[Video]

[standsentinel]

[Once upon a time, Kaidan Alenko was a moody teen fresh from Jump Zero with a fine blend of guilt and anger at The Man. A little experimentation with the milder recreational chemicals goes without saying.]

Ah... no, no turians. There are some packs of feathered raptors, but they're kind've tiny. No krogans, either. But Shepard has a triceratops. She named it Walter.

[Video]

[whoneedslegstofly]

[Hey, everyone's been there done that.]

...This has got to be the weirdest thing that has ever happened to me. And that's saying something considering we're apart of Shepard's crew.

[Video]

[standsentinel]

Would it help if you met the dinosaur?

[Kaidan's delivery is beautifully straight, eyebrows lifted in innocent inquiry. He's just trying to be helpful. Really.]

[Video]

[whoneedslegstofly]

Maybe.

[Oh, he's going to make him show you that damn dinosaur, Kaidan.]

[Video]

[standsentinel]

Fine, fine. [Kaidan sighs, as if being deputized to show off a dinosaur is the worst thing ever.] But if you end up wanting one of your own as a pet, you're the one who's going to have to clean up after it.

[A beat, and a smirk.]

Or bribe the local kids into doing it. Some of the ones that fussed over Walter were like kids and horses, but worse.

[Video]

[whoneedslegstofly]

Hey, I wouldn't object to having a dinosaur to cart me around and keep me from getting hurt. Might be kind of nice.

Like a Wrex that can't talk back.

[Yeah. He likes the sound of that.]

Bribing kids to clean up dinosaur droppings...nice, Kaidan.

[Video]

[standsentinel]

Well, you know. I have to fit that ruthlessly efficient Spectre reputation in somewhere... but hang tight. I should be up at the ship in about half an hour, if you don't find a lift into town first.